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But while it might be fairly easy to avoid topics that are likely to bore someone, it’s much harder to figure out what to say if you want to be interesting. Comment on a topic common to both of you at the moment: the food, the room, the occasion, the weather. I was trying to be all insightful and interesting, and these two people reacted as though everything I said was completely obvious and dull. Now, what to do if a conversation is just not working, and there’s no way to use the “Excuse me, I need to go get something to drink” line?

A friend scans Google News right before he goes anywhere where he needs to make small talk, so he can say, “Did you hear that Justice Souter is stepping down from the bench? It’s also helpful because it allows people to choose their focus (work, volunteer, family, hobby) — preferable to the inevitable question (well, inevitable at least in New York City): “What do you do? ” This is a useful dodge if you ought to know what the person does for a living, but can’t remember. If you do ask a question that can be answered in a single word, instead of just supplying your own information in response, ask a follow-up question. ” an interesting follow-up question might be, “What would your life be like if you still lived there? ” you might ask, “How are you a different kind of parent from your own parents? “What newspapers and magazines do you subscribe to? ” These questions often reveal a hidden passion, which can make for great conversation. React to what a person says in the spirit in which that that comment was offered.

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